This Post Has No Cohesion

[sariagray]

I hate being a woman sometimes. Seriously. 

Can we talk about my hormones for a minute? I hardly cry, as it is a sign of weakness  because I am clearly somehow broken. Just ask thebuttonontop. There are moments, yes, obviously. Generally when I'm already being highly emotional and I watch sad things.

Right now? Right now I'm LISTENING TO A SONG. No, I'm listening to a piece of orchestrated music, no words, and I'm bawling. 

(See also: I hate Torchwood and what it does to me. BALLADS OF FICTIONAL CHARACTERS SHOULD NOT MAKE ME CRY LIKE A CRAZY WOMAN. I should also not play them over and over).

In other news. 

People are exploding things outside of my house. I am pretty sure these things are fireworks of some variety, but there is no way to tell that does not involve me moving from my Sad Emo Panda Saria position. 

And, yeah, okay, I've been going back and reading through ask_aboutcoffee every night, but that is NO REASON why GDL, John Barrowman, and their fictional counterparts should continue to appear in strange, vivid dreams for the past week or so. Like last night. 

 

Let me tell you about last night.

 

Why was I in a meeting with and making coffee for Maynard, GDL, Bill Willingham (who, interestingly, was a woman), and Neil Gaiman? Well, I know I was there because we were making a multimedia comic/show/book/media form (yes - a multimedia media form) of some sort. BUT. WTF, BRAIN!? And what the HELL was the GDL kiss/hands things? "I could tilt your chin up with one hand when I kiss you, but I think it's more meaningful with two. See the difference?"!? And why was it so difficult for me to make coffee, and MOST IMPORTANTLY: Why was I in a skirt suit? I looked ridiculous, I bet.

 

What is happening in my subconscious? I would like to know! My brain should not be off writing crack!fic without my consent. Especially if it isn't going to be so kind as to write it all down for me.

 

John Barrowman is still a recurrent relative of mine, and while I'm sure he's a nice man, I don't really care much about him at all, so I'm not sure why that's happening with such frequency. The night I dream that he is my mother is the night that I stop sleeping for the rest of my life. Thank god I  love caffeine so much.

 

GDL generally appears in meeting or work-type situations. Briefly. I have fetched him coffee numerous times. I never actually bring the coffee to him, though. This must reveal strange things about my psyche (I'M SORRY I AM INADEQUATE, GDL! But I still want to edit your song lyrics!) 

 

I need to shoot these dreams IN THE FACE. Or have sex with them. Even after reading ask_captainjack, I am a little unclear. (I seriously wish I was in fandom during 2009, pre-COE. It seems like it was a good year! I always miss the fun stuff.)

In other other news: Lobster on Saturday, Filet Mignon today, whiskey and cigars tomorrow. I am pretending to be upper-class. It is a good look on me, no? (Especially as I did not pay a dime for any of it. Muahaha. Ha. Ha!)

 

Hope everyone had a lovely weekend and Happy Memorial Day, fellow Americans!  :D (I am suddenly...not emo).

 

Comments

[sariagray.livejournal.com]

Your TMI was almost my TMI until I backspaced it away. So I completely understand and will happily be TMI twins with you. (Really? Is my uterus absolutely necessary!?) I have cried at Hallmark commercials before. Yes. I am That Girl. Or I used to be. Not that That Girl, of course.

Probably because you want it to! I would happily give up my confusing GDL dreams! He doesn't do anything sexy, though. Unless you count the random hand/kiss thing. BUT. I bet if you stared at the picture below, you might have such dreams.